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Friday, 16 April 2010

  • Currently
    A Lesson in Crime
    By Tokyo Police Club
    Citizens of Tomorrow
    see related

    Why?

    Do I love her because of her beauty?
     No, though her smiles can carry me through the day.
    Is it due to her intelligence?
     No, however I admire her passion for learning
    Does my love stem from her wit?
     No, but I enjoy our laughter filled discussions
    Could it be her touch alone?
     No, yet I do long for her warm embrace
    Perhaps her love is the cause?
     No, for I would love her with none in return

    Why is it that I love her...

    I love her because she inspires me;
    My muse sets me free to fly


Saturday, 13 February 2010

  • Currently
    Albatross
    By The Classic Crime
    The Coldest Heart
    see related

    Baking potatoes baking in the sun!

    I find that in the course of a conversation or even just during mental processes, I become overwhelmed pretty frequently, especially in the latter.  When I think of major issues that are discussed and debated I find myself in a never ending cycle of point and counter-point with no hope of concession by either side.  My brain sees the back and forth and just gives up. It's not that I lack the capacity to engage in a debate; it's that when the spiral starts, I know it's never going to end, so I just get out. I don't know if there is an major problem with that practice, but it does worry me at times.  When it comes down to it, the only option is going with what you feel, because let's face it; we are too stubborn to believe someone else anyway.

Tuesday, 07 April 2009

  • Devo - April 07

    "We try to justify ourselves as we compare the extent of our sins with others"

     I am not a worse person for this.  I have made a mistake.  Forgive me, Father.  Allow me to resist temptation.  Thank You for Your grace and mercy.  Help me to rid myself of pride.  Give me the strength to carry on.

    Amen 

Saturday, 07 March 2009

  • Smoke in the Swamp

    The smoke curls between the branches

    As it becomes one with the heavy fog.

    The fire dies and with it light

    Cries of desperation rise out of the dreary bog


    A boy's hurried feet sink deep into the muck

    The lonesome youth calls out to his first love

    Vines twist and pull him in the darkness

    The smoke and fog mix to blot out the stars above


    Clothing now sundered and flesh freshly ripped

    The boy falls; hands and knees sink into the mire

    Doubts of ever finding what is lost enter

    hope dwindles - the situation is dire


    His love calls out and offers new life

    Mustering his strength and trying to be brave

    He says “I'll carry on for you my love

    I don't want this to be our grave”

    COPYCAT FOR REAL!

Thursday, 26 February 2009

  • Currently
    Minutes to Midnight
    By Linkin Park
    In Between
    see related

    Let Me Apologize To Begin With...

    The title is from the song In Between by Linkin Park from the Minutes to Midnight album.  It's a good one.  Unfortunately it reminds me of our relationship.  I say unfortunately because it is a sad song.
    Before we get into what I was supposed to be saying last night on the phone, let me say this: I miss you...

    I miss you.  I miss late summer nights spent discussing whatever came to mind.  I miss laying in your car thinking about how lucky I was to know you.  I miss our first "snuggle" at the Quarry even though it was awkward and I was being eaten alive out there!  I miss watching you tell people what they need to hear when no one else is willing to say it.  I miss locking eyes with you until you break out in that big beautiful smile like you always do.  I miss floating in the ocean with you even though the water made my sore teeth chatter.  I miss staying up late in New York, so that I could think up the words to describe how I felt about you...

    I miss when this relationship was easy, and I miss when I could think about you for a while without tearing up, *but I think most of all, I miss when it didn't hurt to love you*

    The last two weeks have been rough ones.  We have had a high concentration of bad conversations.  I'll take credit for some of that, but a few times I think we would have had those conversations regardless of how I felt.  I have been made aware that if I swallow my feelings like I have been trying to do, one day we our going to wake up and realize that we are miserable.  I am not doing you any favors by trying to absorb this pain.  You cannot run from your feelings, and when you try to shove them down, they eat away at you until finally they come out.  I guess I've kind of had it in my head that if I can last until we are married then it will just get easier as time goes on.  My conversation with Rochelle made me realize that that is not how it works.  We might get through the first year fine, but eventually I will start asking myself the same questions again, and I still wont have any answers.
    I'm not saying that we are done.  I guess I am saying that when you come back (since we wont be kissing) we need to take some time to address this.  "This" being, in our current state or maybe my current state, I don't think that a marriage would work.  Without some sort of change, I just don't see how it would be possible.

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BlazingNegro2007

  • Visit BlazingNegro2007's Xanga Site
    • Name: Justin
    • Location: Lebanon, Pennsylvania, United States
    • Birthday: 12/12/1988
    • Gender: Male
    • Member Since: 12/11/2004

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  • Hey, this is JHen a.k.a. Justin Hennighan. Im a Christian, im half-black, i like most music(from emo to rap) but not country. Somewhat smart, I don't read as much as I should, and I LOVE EMERY. More importantly though, I love Julia!

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